Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Bug Bites

I was in the woods, mountains and other rural locales for the long Memorial Day weekend, and I had a blast with my awesome friends.  However, we were pretty much eaten alive by various types of bugs.  I estimate I have 25-30 bites and they are so insanely itchy.  The worst!  But it feels soooo good to scratch them.

Monday, May 21, 2012

Being in Elevators with People I Don't Know

Elevators are pretty useful things. I'm glad they exist because I work on the 9th floor. I have taken the stairs before and I am mightily out of breath and a bit sweaty by the top. There are a few things I hate about elevators though. Another to add to the list is being in them with strangers. It is SO awkward. Whether you chat about the weather, stare at the wall, or pretend to read email on your phone, riding for any length of time with a stranger is uncomfortable. Think about it. You're basically locked in a tiny box with someone else who may have had Mexican for lunch, or who takes a phone call and discusses their new rash that appeared that morning. Perhaps even worse that riding with strangers is riding with someone who you know just a little. Then you need to fake a conversation with them until one of you gets to your floor.

I remember a long time ago, back when everyone's email addresses ended "" an email went around with funny things you can do in elevators. They included things like bringing a chair and sitting in the elevator reading a book or smiling widely at everyone and proclaiming, "I'm wearing new socks!" Sometimes when I'm in one of these awkward moments I remember this email and wonder if that would help break the tension.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Guest Post: Finding a Seat on the Commuter Rail

Today I bring to you the first ever guest post! Several others of you have offered, but Tim is the first person to actually follow through. I posted a few months ago about something similar and am happy to know it's not just me. I'm overly excited about the first guest post, so without further ado....

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Everyday my wife and I take the train from our home in the South Shore to South Station. The ~40 min trip on the commuter rail is a breeze compared to driving (trust me we've done it a number of times and the Train is always faster and cheaper!). The train is full of working professionals, heading into the city to start their day. Ages and educational backgrounds vary, but pretty much everybody on the train is an adult. Few people act like one.

The train cars are set up with a two seater, aisle, and a three seater. So that means 5 people should be able to sit in each row. Wrong. For some reason people don't like to be the one stuck in the middle (I get it). But when the train is packed, I really don't care about you not wanting to cozy up to your train mate. Move over three seaters are made for three. What bugs me is the attitude people give you when you ask them to move over. They look at you like, "really you want to sit three people in a seat that was designed only for three?" Well yes, as a matter of fact I do. I'd rather sit with you, than stand needlessly while you cross your legs and have a nice place to put your coffee. Move the F over.

Now, once the initial rude request has been made, 'Excuse me would you mind if I take a seat", and the rolling of the eyes, "Awwwww I can't believe he wants to sit here" is complete, then comes the most strange behavior. Instead of sliding in, the person on the outside gets up, stops the flow of people into the train, grabs their bag and motions for me to sit in the middle. Well ok fine! I get it, I do. Nobody likes to be monkey in the middle, but when you slow down the boarding of the train just so you can have 3 extra inches of elbow room.... grow up, move over, and let the efficiency of public transportation shine.

So that's a normal day on the train. Sometimes, I share a seat with somebody who is SO important, that they need to work on their laptop on the train. But sometimes I sit next to even more important folks than these people. These ultra elites have a 3G card plugged into their USB port, and a folder of materials they need to review as the update their spreadsheets and ppts. And they do not like having a buddy to sit next to on the train. The thing I hate about these people is that they think, because of their fancy job title, and demanding schedule that they deserve the extra seat for their $400 briefcase, and their SBUX coffee to sit while they type away. When I ask to sit next to them, I get this look that says, "Can't you see I'm working here, and I have a tie on! I'm important and I need 2 seats. You should stand." Well I have news for you. Public transportation is the great equalizer, and everyone is the same on a PUBLIC train. Move over and give me a seat. Please.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

That Blogger Emails Me When I Comment on My Own Blog

Dear Blogger,
I appreciate that you email me when someone new comments on my blog. It happens so rarely* that it's a nice surprise when it happens. I like to respond to the comments so people know I'm listening and to encourage more commenting. However, as soon as I reply to a comment, you, Blogger, email me to let me know I commented. DUH! Can't you see that the Google profiles are the same?? I do not need an email letting me know what I just did. Thanks for nothing.


Tuesday, May 15, 2012

That You Can't Un-Push Elevator Buttons

Sometimes you get into an elevator and you accidentally push the wrong button. Maybe you're used to going to 4, but today you have an appointment on 5. You push the button for the fourth floor before remembering that's not where you're going that day. Don't you wish you could just un-select 4? Or sometimes I push the down button to leave for the day, and then realize I left my cell phone on my desk, so I need to run back and grab it. I wish I could undo my elevator call so that people don't have to stop at my floor and wonder what happened. Of course, I would not always use this feature for good. If anyone ever got in to go one floor I'd probably unpush their floor's button because they should really be taking the stairs.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Being Unable to Open a Childproof Bottle

I just got a new bottle of vitamins. They are basically candy with calcium and vitamin D added in which is why these are the first vitamins I have taken with any consistency. But because children would probably be tempted to eat the whole bottle in one sitting (I know I am) the bottle has a childproof lid. Seems fair to me. Except that I can't open it. I just spent 5 unsuccessful minutes trying to open it. My hand hurts from trying to "push down and turn."

A three and a half year old recently told me I wasn't a grown up "because [I'm] not done growing yet" so perhaps this is one of those things I am just not ready for. Also here's hoping the toddler is right and that I have a few more inches left to grow. 5'5" here I come!