Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Double Parking

I hate double parkers. Seriously. What a selfish act. Whatever the fine is for double parking, it is obviously not large enough because people do it all the time. If the punishment for being double parked was losing a digit, no one would double park.

Anyone who lives in Allston/Brighton/Brookline that has to drive downtown in the mornings knows that Comm Ave is the worst for double parkers. FedEx, USPS, electricians, random people, taxis, delivery trucks, moving vans, more random people... you can't drive in the right lane because every block has someone double parked and blocking the lane, but you can't drive in the left lane because of the people turning left and clogging up that lane... it's such a horrible drive. And if you are on a bike, you are just toast, because the drivers are now more angry than usual, so even if you are obeying traffic laws (like you should be since you are a vehicle! but that hate is a different entry for another day), they will try to hit you because someone else blocked their way.

Another thing I hate about double parking, is this: you get stuck behind someone who is double parked, so you put on your blinker and wait for traffic in the next lane to clear. Then the person behind you pulls out into the next lane to pass, even though you clearly had your blinker on and wanted to move into that lane. UGGHHH that makes me so angry. OBVIOUSLY I wanted to turn. I even had my blinker on, you JERK!

I have decided that I would be a terrible police officer because I would see someone double parked and just yell at them for being a selfish a-hole. "Do you realize that you are disrupting traffic for the 100 cars behind you?? Do you realize that you just made their days a little worse because you couldn't be troubled to go find yourself a parking space on the next block? Do you realize that I'm going to have to chop off your pinky toe now???" Okay maybe that last question would only come into play if I was a police officer and ruler of the world. But then again if I ruled the world we would also get free cookies on Friday. So not only would no one double park (unless they had no hands or feet, in which case they probably wouldn't be driving anyway) but we'd also be munching on some free Oreos. The world would be a much better place.

No comments:

Post a Comment